How My Daughter-In-Law Is Changing Me

With all of my reading on parenting lately I’ve learned that as mothers we influence our sons’ lives so significantly that we will mold them into the husbands they will become and teach them what to search for in a bride (the same is true for fathers with their daughters.) This is both wonderful and terrifying all at the same time. The fact that the depth of love I show my son will be something he seeks from the woman he will call his wife, is something that couldn’t be more pleasing. I adore my son and I feel such love for him that if his wife loves him half as much then I am the luckiest mother-in-law in the world.   

What’s the problem then?? Well isn’t it obvious, I love that boy way too much to hand him over to someone like me. I’m not good enough, ARE YOU CRAZY!! That means she’s going to be moody and controlling and indecisive and OMG she’s going to be a know it all. She’s going to think she’s never wrong, my son will be lucky if he’s allowed to have an opinion at all! I need help to pray this crazy woman away!!

Who knew I was so scary, it’s no wonder im still single! Lol

What is the solution? My future daughter-in-law is going to help me be the best wife and mother I can possibly be and she is going to save my future husband a lot of heartache. Every time I think of how I want my boy to be supported and encouraged, she will teach me to lift up my husband and stand by him through his successes and failures. When I look at the picture I’m painting for my son’s future wife I will see better the love my spouse deserves and do my best to be worthy of his commitment to me. Every time I think of the appreciation I want her to have for him it will remind me to stop and tell my husband how thankful I am God brought him into my life. Whenever I think of how I want a happy family life for him she will teach me to spend more time at the dinner table and less at the drive thru. My daughter-in-law is pretty amazing.

So what does your child’s potential spouse look like? My prayer is you make her beautiful inside and out, that you make him a man who couldn’t be more loyal to your daughter, that she supports your son and makes him a better man and that he shows your daughter more love than any one person can handle. I pray they make you fiercely proud of the job you’ve done and that you praise God for them every day!

Everyone Has One

Opinions, everybody has them and if you are keeping up with my blog you are bound to hear mine on all sorts of things. I’ll tell you about books and products and food and politics and religion and people, anything I have an opinion on I’m sure you’ll hear about and I’d love to hear your thoughts as well. I’d like to address something that bothers me though, people tend to throw around the phrase “closed minded” a lot and it really gets my blood boiling. If you have an opinion about something and you believe you are right and someone else is wrong GOOD FOR YOU, BE PROUD!!! If you can and will stand up for your beliefs, BRAVO, not enough people fight for what they believe to be right so we need more people like you!

Now does having an opinion mean people shouldn’t listen to an opposing one or research other things to expand their knowledge, of course not. It is good to know what others believe and why, but people shouldn’t be bullied and called closed minded because they stand firm in their beliefs and opinions. How much sense does it make to just rollover and agree with something you feel is wrong for the sake of being agreeable? Do not sacrifice your right to an opinion for the sake of someone else’s. Of course you think your opinion is right because hopefully you think you are pretty smart and you came up with your opinion based on the facts presented to you. Feeling this way does not make anyone closed minded, it just means every other argument presented to us wasn’t compelling enough to change our minds.

Folks, when we come across any opinion and we feel that it is wrong or silly or uneducated or “Closed Minded” we need to realize that it is totally OK, because that person may feel the same way about ours. We may feel we have been sent from the heavens above just for this moment in time to get them set straight, and that is awesome we should go for it, BUT no matter what we have to say when we present any opinion and the argument behind it, it needs to be in an informative yet uplifting manor. Don’t get ugly with people, people will judge your message based on your character so if you want to influence them you need to have a good one. Calling people names, being condescending or insulting a person’s intelligence is just totally unnecessary and it doesn’t make anyone seem any more right on any subject. Remember class we catch more flies with honey ;)     

Besides if not relenting to the idea that someone else’s opinion may be right is what being closed minded is then arguing with them makes YOU closed minded, because according to you THEIR OPINION MAY BE RIGHT!  

Opinions, everyone has one, this is just mine =)

Be Blessed!

It's Rehab Time

For those of you who don’t yet live by this phrase I’d like to introduce you to Trent Shelton. Trent is a former NFL Football player turned motivational speaker and founder of RehabTime. He is quickly becoming my go to man for a good word from God. He has been gifted with the ability to help you see the wrong in your situation, to help you find the negative the things holding you back and open your eyes to how you are keeping yourself from God’s best for your life. Check him out @ http://trentshelton.com/   It all starts with you ;)   I hope you enjoy him as much as I do!

10 Tips for International Adoption

1.      Know the process - Make sure you know what to expect from your country of choice so you can hold your agency accountable. Join groups, read blogs and talk to people who have dealt with your country

2.      Speak with your prospective agency about your expectations – After you have a good idea of the process speak with your agency and see if you find any holes. Did you hear something from someone using a different agency that you have a question about? Don’t let them talk you in circles. You are paying too much and have too much at stake to just take their word for it.

3.      Research medical conditions – Learn the challenges and corrective actions that can be taken for common diagnosis so you are aware of what special needs you may be willing to consider

4.      Consider widening your age range – You’d be surprised how easily you can fall in love with a 5 yr old even though you were searching for a 2 yr old  J

5.      Watch your home study wording and try to understand theirs – Wording can be very important and tricky when it comes to special needs. Did you know that for some countries that when the child reaches a certain age a diagnosis that once said mental delay will now read retardation?? 

6.      Get to know the language – It takes us a lot longer to learn than it does the children and you need to be able to communicate, so start early

7.      The FBI check takes FOREVER get that started ASAP

8.      Moving will cost you money – Try to stay put if you can but if not consider the home study update as part of your moving costs

9.       Pay attention to your Hague training - Consider the child’s circumstances and do not over romanticize your home coming or you could be very disappointed     

10.  Stay busy – If you are proactive and work hard on getting your dossier together time will fly. After that do a little around the house, get the room ready, read parenting books and enjoy the next bit of time to yourself because soon you’ll have your sweet child home and be praying for a moment to rest J   

Pictures from my Bulgaria trip - Scenery of Pleven & Sofia

 

St. Sofia



 

 

We were blessed to be there in beautiful sunny weather next time we might get to check it out in the snow. 

Triumph Church

There is so much to say about Triumph Church and the role it has played in my life that I had to jot down just a little about it. I have been so blessed to have been led to such a good church home with such great pastors and elders to influence my life. Pastors Randon and Lindsay Clark are really awesome leaders who deliver powerful words from God and we have an amazingly gifted worship team who does a fantastic job of welcoming the presence of the Lord.

I must say though the thing that makes my heart swell for my church is the youth’s love for God. Watching children and young adults worship the Lord with abandon is the most awe inspiring thing I have ever seen and Triumph Church has it in spades. As a woman who was saved later in life and has lived so much for things of the world that I missed the greatness of God for so many years, I desperately  long to see my child live for God and be filled with his love and joy. If you are looking for a place to get your children involved with God there is no better place than Triumph Church Beaumont.

So if you live near a Triumph Church Campus (Beaumont, Nederland, Sugar Land – Stafford, or coming soon WASHINGTON D.C.) and are looking for a church home for you and your family come out and visit. And if you aren’t in one of our areas and would like to plug in or you would just like to see what you are getting into first we have live webcasts so you can watch from your living room, how great is that J If you’d like more information under Helpful Links I’ve attached a link that will lead you straight to the Triumph Beaumont website, I hope you’ll look us up.

My Son

It's a very hard thing to not be able to post a picture of your child when all you want to do is post a billboard and shout from the roof tops to show everyone what a proud momma you are, but it comes along with the adoption territory so I’ll try not to complain too much. lol I will still tell you a little about my son though because I know you are dying to hear all about him :)

 

One of the reasons I’d like to share about my son is for those prospective parents out there, for people with adoption on their hearts. International adoption can be very scary it is terrifying to review a medical report about your child and hear the phrase “high risk.” So I’d like you to take solace in what I have to say and know that God is not limited to a doctor’s diagnosis so your child can overcome the world.

 

About my son – my blessing

 

 

My little boy is getting to be a big boy very quickly; he will turn 6 next month. And how awesome is God??? I’ll tell you, my son was named "Follower of Christ". Yep the meaning of his original translated name is the best prophetic word I could hope for his life. God is so good.

 

I’d like to share a little from his medical report with you. - Status – Delayed physical and neuropsychological development, moderate mental delay, anemia, possible kidney problems and born with congenital lues (syphilis). Mental process is delayed compared to other children his age, doesn’t demonstrate imagination, is not sure footed and does not yet speak in sentences. Mother had psychopathic-like personality change.

 

This of course doesn’t cover half of it but you should get the picture thinks are quite scary. A 5 year old should be much further along than this right???

 

 See if you have done your homework about Bulgarian adoption you know that most children grow up in orphanages and that children who grow up in orphanages are often significantly further behind then children who are raised in a familial environment. You may also run across some information about a certain orphanage that is very difficult to swallow, you may watch videos or read stories that show how far behind the neglected children can get. This is the type of environment my son spent the first 4 years of his life in. Because of his diagnosis he was given very little attention from the staff and was not permitted much direct contact with the other children. He didn’t take his first steps until well into his 3^rd year of life. For the next year he would be moved to a much better orphanage but still no receive much individual care outside of the therapies and doctors’ visits.  

 

BUT GOD … But see God knew what he was doing. He knew that once he had spoken the word to me that this was my son that I would know without a doubt that none of these things mattered. But God knew what he had planned for this child. BUT GOD was working on my child adjusting his situation, preparing him for what was to come J

 

In December of 2012 my son was moved into a foster home. Bulgaria is slowly transitioning into a more foster care friendly area and my son was blessed to be a part of this movement of God. I couldn’t have asked for a better foster family for my child. He is so loved and so well taken care that he has grown in leaps and bounds. The child who was only speaking random words before is a little chatter box! He loves to talk and I love the hear it, he has the cutest little voice and I’m pretty sure the Bulgarian he speaks is the most beautiful language I’ve ever heard. He repeats English exceptionally well and even uses words in the right context. He walks better and further than I do and is growing like a weed. And get this, he’s in Kindergarten and does awesome in class!! We still have plenty of challenges to face but we will face them as a family.  

 

See, the changes in children just from being moved out of the orphanages are amazing. There are reports of things like this happening all of the time. Does this mean that all of the children’s problems will disappear, no of course not … BUT GOD.  Be aware of your child’s medical diagnosis, take it seriously and learn what challenges lie ahead but please don’t limit God and don’t live in fear. Pray, pray and pray some more, recruit intercessors to pray with you, search all of heaven and talk to God every day until you receive your answer about your child from God, and when you do be at peace. God gives you his best and his love will not fail you. Trust in him, you will be so blessed when you do, struggles and all!